Coping and Moving On

Considering what I have gone through in the past week or so, I think I am doing relatively well. I can't help but wonder "why me" and this is what I am having the hardest time dealing with. I know that so many women go through what I am going through and all, I'm not special in that by any means. How many women have to go through all the complications with one birth that barely enabled me to have a chance of conceiving again and then take the first child that I conceive after that point? Now, I'm sure that some of you are thinking "atleast you already have one child" are wondering what I am so whiney about. I have always wanted two kids, that's it. I don't want O to be an only child and at this point in my life, I'm ready for the second one. How many couples out their get divorced? should they never be able to get married again since they already had one spouse? I think not! Ah, rant over.

Ironically in this month's parents magazine that I received the day after my D&C, there is an article on "second time infertility" - is this supposed to be some kind of sign to me?

I have my follow-up appointment next Friday to make sure that everything is healing as it should be. The doctor seems to think that we can start trying again as soon as we want - phycially maybe, emotionally may take some more time for us.

I've been really trying to get back into my routine as the beginning of the semester is quickly approaching and I really should be "over it" soon. (At least as it is seen by most people - i.e. no more breaking down and crying in front of non-family about it). Getting back to work is nice, but I will be even better once I can start working out again - need to lose some more of this darn tummy of mine! So you all better watch out - a smokin' hot mama will be coming your way soon!!